a fond farewell (and reflections from a no-longer-newlywed)

It was almost three years ago that I started blogging here, and with the honor of being a bee came friendships, career changes, and general awesomeness that has changed my life for the better. As silly as I used to think blogging was, it has become something I really love, and I have Weddingbee to thank for the introduction to blog-land in the first place.

I've been fairly quiet over the last year or so since, you know, I'm no longer planning a wedding and all; while I still hang around the hive from time-to-time, I thought that it is high time I bid a proper adieu to Weddingbee. Mr. Cupcake and I recently celebrated our second wedding anniversary in September, and it struck us both that the last two years have flown by so quickly, it's difficult to grasp the concept that we're not quite newlyweds anymore — we are now full-fledged marrieds. Who'd have thunk it!

at a family wedding the weekend after our second anniversary

The last two years have brought both unwelcome and welcome changes to our relationship and our new life together. Mr. Cupcake got laid off shortly after we got married, and then went back to work after a long 10 months of searching. I then decided to continue the craziness in our lives by quitting my job and starting a new business, Curious & Company, with a few colleagues, which included launching a line of letterpress wedding stationery called Claremont Collection. It has been a whirlwind, to say the least.

Through all of the excitement over the last few years, Mr. Cupcake has been the best cheerleader I could have ever asked for. While he's always been 100% supportive of everything I do, there is just something about being married that makes it a little different from before — it makes his unending support all that much sweeter. While I know that we'll always love each other, it's comforting to sit back and realize how much we really like each other, too. We genuinely have fun together and just enjoy being partners in life. We continue to perfect our relationship day by day, and work together to set goals for ourselves — we hope to be able to buy a home soon, and someday have some mini cupcakes to turn our world upside down. Whatever happens, we're excited for the ride.

In addition to all of the life changes happening around me, I still often catch up on Weddingbee and other wedding blogs; now that I've totally moved on from wedding planning madness, I often think about how I might have done things differently. I don't regret a single thing about our day, but it is a lot easier to put things in perspective when I read about the million details that future brides are juggling and I remember the feeling of being completely overwhelmed. There are a few words of wisdom this no-longer-newlywed would love to impart on all of you brides-t0-be, if I may:

• Don't sweat the small stuff. I know that's probably the most overused mantra in the world and you may want to throw something at the computer screen when you read that, but it's true. I see brides fretting over if their guy should wear an ivory shirt to match their ivory dress (advice: a white shirt on him will look crisper and cleaner in photos, and no one will notice or care that you don't totally match!), or being upset that the pink on their invitations doesn't exactly match the pink linens that will be on the tables, and I just want to hug each one and tell her that everything will be alright. Ladies, I have been that extremely detail-oriented bride, and it's exhausting. There is nothing wrong with caring about the details, but don't drive yourself crazy over them. Decide what's important, accept that you may need to be flexible about everything else, and then embrace the imperfections that will make your day uniquely YOURS. I promise that as long as your guests are having a good time, they really aren't concerned about the multiple shades of pink. I. Prom. Ise.
  
  
• Go with your gut and do things your way. Stick to your guns. If something is important to you, don't let anyone tell you that it's silly, or not sticking with tradition, or too trendy. Who cares if something is silly, or not sticking with tradition, or too trendy if you and your fiancé love it and it makes you happy? Your guests won't care if every couple getting married this year has a photo booth, because chances are they're not going to every other wedding happening this year. If your family wants you to have a big wedding but you know deep down that you're a small wedding kind of girl, figure out a way to make it happen. While your day is about family and having the people you love around you, it is also about you and the love of your life, and you should have the wedding that best reflects who you are.
  
  
• Wear comfortable underthings on your wedding day. I'm so serious. Test those lacy white lovelies out before committing to wearing them for an entire day under what is probably a heavy dress that does not easily lend itself to, ahem, picking. I look back on our wedding day very lovingly, as it truly was one of the best days of my life... but I also have yet to forget the fact that for 100% of the time that I was partying it up on the dance floor, I had a wedgie and those dainty white undies I had chosen were the culprit. It was highly annoying and there was nothing I could do about it. And now all of the internetz knows it. But I'm okay with that if it saves even one bride from the wrath of uncomfortable undies on her wedding day.
  
  
• Know and accept that you can't have all of the perfect pictures. Photography is certainly a big deal on your wedding day, and having photos to remember your day by are totally worth the expense. But I think the internet has jaded us all a little, and we think that every amazing photo can (and should) be duplicated for our own day. The reality is: it's impossible to have it all. Yes, you should hire a photographer who you love and trust with capturing a very important day in your life, and the photos they take may well be the only physical things from your wedding that you have to look back on in 30 years. But you'll also have the memories, and the spouse, and at the end of the day it's okay if the photographer didn't get every single shot that you envisioned. Love the photos you have and be excited that the unscripted moments you never imagined could occur were captured, just for you.

I'm sure I could go on for days, but I'll spare you. Ultimately, no matter what little unexpected surprises pop up while wedding planning or on your wedding day, just know that there are many, many more days in your future to be spent with the person you love the most in the world... and they will absolutely outweigh any unplanned bumps in the road that may occur on the day you say "I do." Marriage is an amazing ride, and your wedding day is only the beginning.

Hive, thank you so much for reading (this post and the many that came before it) and for being such an amazing community of people who have made me feel so loved. If you're ever so inclined to keep up with the happenings in my life, I have happily continued blogging over at my new internet home, Claremont Road. I'd love for you to visit, anytime.

Love always,
Mrs. Cupcake